Dedication to Scott at Burning Man 2003

For Scott's Dad

All of Us

This is painful but necessary. I know it's not political, per se, but we have no philosophy topic, yet, on the site. -FS

There is now & this is posted. mjw



J. Scott Brickley
Rest in Peace
1954-2003

_______________________________________________________
SCOTT BRICKLEY

Your Location=Marion, Ohio

text=I am no "ist" and espouse no "ism" I'm looking
for anyone with a similar outlook and nondualism
seems close. Here is my story. MT space ad
infinitum

I seem to have fallen into a hole in my inquiries
into the mystery. A vision, one supposes, of the
primal uncreated emptiness. so real. so immediate.
It has landed me alone

in the middle of a howling void

far beyond the fireflies of creation.

All I see is a slow death by boredom and the
horrible spectacle of human suffering. I need
information and instruction. guidance and support.
someone to talk to. My mind is leaching off into
infinite vacuity. Sometimes the world dissolves
before my eyes into particles in space. I'm getting
used to it and have learned to keep my mouth shut,
but life is not the way it used to be. How can I
practice a vain hope of perception? truth is self
evident. every question answers itself. Is this the
end of knowledge? it's just stuff. like everything
else. suspended in an emptiness with no boundary.
What am I supposed to do with this? (sweet smile,
shoulder shrug, "what do you think you're supposed
to do?)

please help.

We humans possess language which not only allows us
to achieve consensus regarding this world we share,
but also gives us "hands for the mind" (H.G. Wells)
to turn these objects this way and that, by the
handles of the words which represent them. I think
I think in English. "Empty space" is just a word
(two actually) and usually connotes an unfilled
containment but can also lead to an internal
experience of the unconfined field of creation. My
lay understanding of the current theories in
quantum physics, molecular biology (DNA),
neurochemistry, etc. have somehow led to the
intuition that creation arises spontaneously in the
continual blossoming of uncreated empty space.
Somehow DNA stabilizes and defines individual
organisms in the particle field. Somehow thought
arises in this continual blossoming of chemical
interactions. Unqualified to discuss matters of
faith, much of my time is spent in slack-jawed
amazement at this unspeakable complexity with
"nothing" to be said and "nothing" to be done.

a state of "depression". What a great word. The
depressed exhibit all kinds of symptomatic thought
patterns. We brood over mortality, futility ,the
curse of being so horribly aware, the impossibility
of accurate expression and uncertainty about what's
worth expressing anyway. There's no control, and
moods that ravage like violent winds of obscure
origin. Most seem to think that it's the depression
which causes these thoughts. It seems more likely
that that an honest curiosity about this human
condition and a minimum of objective analysis must
lead to certain interim conclusions that would
depress ANYBODY. All the children trembling in
their beds with dark presentiments of annihilation
desperate hope for the immortal soul triumphant,
luminous in the void. They grow up. The blind faith
forged in that moment of stark terror remains a
filter screening all perception.

Please, no wry anecdotes about turtles all the way
down.

We are all in this together. Worst case scenario,
right now. All the time. Wake up. Do you have a
hair on your ass? Just look at it. Nobody who wrote
any of those old books had a ghost of a clue.
Hacking on stone tablets dreaming the Hubble
telescope? How do you find the center when there's
no fucking circumference? Find the center. It's
everywhere. Every "where" is one "here". Right now,
inside and outside.

Each particle occupies a position directly in the
center of this empty space.

Technology seems a good example of the mechanics of
evolution. A "go, no-go", Boolean, binary on-off,
ladder logic compilation of what works. Circle to
wheel to gear to turbine to generator to polarity
spin to covalent bonds to "the circular motion,
destined to take the place of the mud shark in your
mythology "(Zappa) Theories are subject to the
selective environment of critical reasoning and
independent testing fueled by self-interest.
Objects and ideas that survive enter the realm of
consensus. Maybe the sixth sense is common sense.
Maybe objectivity lies in the realization of
oneself as an object. A created object, held in
molecular relief from the particle/wave field for
as long as the phenotypical DNA remains intact. A
particle/wave field suspended in an empty space
with no boundary. There is no profit to the
individual in holding such a view (as if holding
anything were possible) but it seems obvious and
unavoidable. One has everything to lose and nothing
to gain. It's unpopular, like a turd in the
punchbowl. I "float" the idea in search of kindred,
and have no desire to affect anyone's feelings of
safety and happiness. My own experience has
involved terror, disorientation, struggle,
exhaustion, capitulation, integration, and now
communica-shun. I have come to feel a general sense
of ease in an effortless coming into being within a
creation wherein all is as it should be, that is
when I'm not cussing other drivers, bitching about
the cold, envying the wealthy, tortured by lust, or
seeking comfort and safety. which is as it should
be. Fortunate I am not to be sitting balls in the
dust with nothing but prayer.

When you do not contemplate empty space, your
attention has been seduced by some created object.
Please objectively consider this physically empty
space. It extends in all directions, a sphere with
no circumference. Somehow created stuff finds
expression here, and that stuff is entirely
permeated by empty space. If Heaven and hell are
real, they have borders in space. If I have a
soul, then it too, will find itself coming into
being in the middle of this empty space. Provided
it still has the faculty to realize its
predicament.

If you think you have a soul, you're just a TOURIST
here.

God, the creator of the universe must precede the
universe and the universe blooms in this empty
space spontaneously. It's axiomatic. the creator is
uncreated. It seems that "God" is a word for
something that has no material aspect. As the
Creator, that which causes creation, God must be
pre-existant or uncreated. This empty space,
observed in contrast to the stuff blooming within
it and which extends in all directions without
containment is God.

"Behold the fowls of the air...the lilies of the
field...Which of you by taking thought can add one
cubit unto his stature?"

Existing is effortless.

But this empty space... Look into it I share your
fate.

Of heat and cold, cold is primal. Of light and
dark, dark is primal. Look at the night sky, so
much more cold than heat. so much more dark than
light. Of something and nothing, nothing is primal.
Actually empty, inside and out. Look at this world,
see all the dear ones. My fault. careless,
helpless.

The world unfolds in outrageous complexity

Regard the perfect world blooming in this empty
space, your effortless coming into being here in
this empty space. When we sit, let's all feel free
to call it "You".

To gripe is to sin. "The Lord giveth and the Lord
taketh away."

Be grateful there is anything at all.

Oh my. In the middle of this empty space Nothing
does not change Tat Tvam Asi Dirt, scapegoat, look
into the face of the deep.

This talk about consciousness and dreaming assigns
undue significance to neurochemical activity.
However, the individual exists at the molecular
level. And is now blooming from empty space with
the rest of this created stuff. Including thought
itself. Talented phenotypes, this is true magic...
Watch thought as it comes into being. This is
where/when everything else is coming into being.
Plant your mustard seed now. If you can find it

Tao is this empty space.

This physically empty space. It's scary. Look at
it.

Somehow, something blooms in this empty space
Matter finds arrangement and possibility Complexity

Mind blooms in this empty space With the rest of
this created stuff Mind looks at this empty space

And drops its fudge

There are those who depend on me I can't think of
what comes next Survival doesn't make sense

Does goodness makes sense?

I am the helpless witness of my thoughts, my mind
is a dog, dashing, sniffing, digging up bones. I
don't know what will attract his interest next and
I have to face whatever he finds. Maybe it occurs
to me to say "sit", or maybe he just sits. Anyway,
it's a relief. Once he got a whiff of empty space,
he jerked the leash right out of my hand.

This is still the first moment of creation.

Meaning is at stake
_______________________________________________________

DOC HOBBES

I am not a ghost. I am a spirit. Difference?
Energy.

I was born on the other side of the crossed line so
what do you mean with your threat "Don't cross that
line"... "Come back" I yell into the back of your
face.

What is Zen? Catching a ball, sitting in a chair,
peeing in a toilet, blowing your nose. What is not
Zen? Missing every time.

What I seek does not exist... imagine my surprise
when I found it!

Finding the right place is easy... getting there is
the difficulty.

There is no frequency to thought. Thus, mind
reading by any means is simply the art of
listening.

I would never risk where I am now for what I might
have been if re-born knowing what I know.

The concept of Forgiveness is a 'ego filling'
wrapped in 'self righteousness pastry'.

Birthday Faces

What a great day!  Scott surrounded by cool friends, lots of gifts and one gift that took a bit of negotiating to pull off.

Scottie

This blog was dedicated to Scott, please join, converse & invite others

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